Making sense of pain, making room for joy and connection, and rebuilding a self: that’s what therapy with me is all about. My job is to walk by your side as we wander through all the mysteries and puzzles of your life. People bring all sorts of questions into therapy:
- Why am I so anxious?
- Why can’t I make a relationship work?
- Why does my body hurt?
- Why do I fall apart so easily?
- Why am I so insecure since my family loved me?
- Why can’t I get close to people?
As it turns out, even in the most loving of families pain can never be totally shut out. Parents love to the best of their abilities, great or small, depending on how they were nurtured. We are learning that parents who are overwhelmed by difficult circumstances while trying to raise small children, inadvertently pass on their distress to their children’s budding body-selves. Divorce, catastrophic trauma, financial reversals, accidents, criminal assaults, poor health or serious illness in a sibling can all tax the coping resources of the most dedicated parents. Their children can grow up with overwhelmed nervous systems, at a loss to self-soothe and self-nurture. They may learn to tune out the signals from their bodies as a way of calming everything down and not being a bother. Reliance on tuning out may become a preferred way of coping with distress. Eventually, the body rebels. When life disappoints in a big way – via a break-up, a car wreck, the death of a pet or loved one- then the house of cards may fall down.
Whatever has brought you to my office, or this website: know you are not alone. Indeed, trying to manage everything alone may be exactly what created this conundrum for you. Together, we will sort it all out.